"I used to lust after women everyday"

Brenda Burton of Jacksonville, NC didnt spare any pains to contrast the type of woman she was before she met Jesus Christ. She told her story of transformation from a lost lesbian to a woman of God on a CBN feature. Story here and video here.

“At the age of three, I was molested by my female cousin,” Brenda said. “I was molested in college. I was raped in college. And I didn’t love me. I had vowed that I would never let a man touch me, that I would never open my heart to a man.”


She developed a tough personality and began to dress and act like a man.

“I used to go out there and I learned how to work on a car. Everything that boys would do, that’s what I wanted to do,” Brenda said. “I didn’t want to clean up. I didn’t learn makeup. I didn’t learn how to put makeup on. I didn’t know.”

In her early 20’s, Brenda began to desire women.

“I used to love women. I used to lust after them everyday, all day,” she said. “And I was like, ‘I was born this way.’”

Brenda had multiple partners. Eventually she settled down with a woman she thought she’d be with forever. But ultimately, her lover thought their relationship was wrong.

“She knew God, but she had walked away from God,” Brenda said. “And she had told me, she said, “God is never going to let me go. So she had come to the agreement – she said, ‘look, I’m going to have to get out of here. I’m going to have to leave, because God won’t let me go.’”

Its truly amazing how God will reach us even in the midst of our confusion. Like Brenda, I thought “settling down” with another man would bring me the peace and satisfaction I longed for. But it was just another rabbit hole.

For those who have once knew God, its in his hands to open the door for your escape from homosexual sin. When he does, do like Brenda, myself and countless others have done. Take  what God offers and leave sin behind.


16 thoughts on “"I used to lust after women everyday"

  1. praise god! thats a wonderful testimony, i have a cousin who is still currently living in that lifestyle. i pray that god will open her eyes and show her that he has more for her than what the devil and this world has to offer! im going to have to get her to read this womans story

  2. Brenda’s testimony confirms my research and findings: Many who are participating in the homosexual lifestyle were molested as children or adolescents. When will gay activists finally admit this travesty? These victims of molestation were not “born gay.”

  3. Gwen, over the course of the last 13 years I have ministered to men and women involved in homosexuality, I’ve personally spoken to thousands. 95% of those told me they were sexually molested. I was myself.

    The gay community will pretend to the death that connection is bogus. While I dont believe it is a direct cause and effect in all cases, it most certainly is a mitigating factor in how one lives out their sexuality, especially since it was damaged at early ages.

  4. I don’t think the connection is bogus. Although there is a difference between correlation and causation, I am sure that many gay people can trace their attraction for the same sex back to some sort of childhood trauma, be it abuse or something else.

    But I am not one of them. I was never molested. In fact, I grew up in a stable Southern Baptist home and had a very normal and happy childhood. My parents were consistent in how they raised me and my brother, yet somehow he is straight and I’m gay.

  5. Phoenix,

    What you are going through is an attack from the devil, he is lying to you and making you feel that you were born like this. Trust me you have people who struggle with anger also, many men think its good to have many women, it feels normal but we cannot say we were born that way so it must be right, God expects us to live holy but true holiness only comes through Christ.

    You see the battle is in the mind, you “feel” you are gay because of the thoughts the devil/demons are telling you, if you take control of your thoughts through CHrist you will be able to overcome the lie of the enemy of your soul.

    I myself struggled with fornication (The Lord delivered me with one touch )and pornography and I still have to wrestle with it but it is up to me to renew my mind with Gods word and reject every though that in my mind that is not of God. Some times are easier than others but I continue to fight and right now even though the devil tries to bring temptation to me I am able to withstand by the power of God.

    Dont accept the lies of the enemy!

    Be Blessed!!!!

  6. This is an awesome testimony for Christ. May the Lord be praised!
    I do not believe homosexuality necessarily stems from an abusive childhood. I was never molested, and I lived a homosexual life for many years. I chose to act out on the wickedness in my own heart. I don’t think horrific acts like this are the cause of why we sin. We sin because of what lies in our own hearts, this is what Christ teaches in Matthew 15:19.
    We are affected by how we were raised, but that doesn’t excuse our actions. When we are raised in an environment that is void of God, the Bible, and all it teaches, we do tend to gear more towards wrongdoing. On the other hand, there have been many a son and daughter of preachers who were ‘wild as a buck’, so why is that? It all stems from the wickedness within each one of us.

  7. Lyn, I agree with you but I do believe that circumstances in our lives can trigger certain behaviours. We also have to look at family curses and demonic strongholds apart from the sin nature.

  8. yes phoenix,

    its not jus “somehow” he’s straight and you’re gay. The devil is obviously wanting you to believe that. God has a greater purpose for you and the devil knows this so he will try to keep your mind as confused as he possibly can to keep you from your purpose. i pray that the lord removes the scales from your eyes and you can be delivered. GOD bless you!

  9. I am new to making comments. I wanted to really comment on the article you had about Bishop Charles Blake of the COGIC endorsing same-gender marriage. I did not know this and I wanted to thank you for the info. I think him making that endorsement is great and another step forward in God’s display that Christ’s love, grace and mercy really is for ALL people.

    If Ms Burton really did change her orientation, I wish her the best. I pray that her heart is big enough to wish me the best also in my 8 year same-gender marriage.

    GCMW: Bishop Blake didnt endorse homosexual marriage. As the title reads he endorsed documents (some claim unwittingly) which approve of homosexual marriage as a “human right”. Welcome to GCM Watch. Please read the comment rules.

  10. Sexual molestation of innocent children are significant factors in a plethora of ungodly behaviors,not just homosexuality.

    I agree with Lyn because some were molested and didnt turn to homosexuality (but did other destructive things) and some were molested and did turn to homosexuality. Molestation is not a smoking gun answer as to the cause of homosexuality.

    Yet as Paul said satan is full of “devices” and the bible didnt say that children are off limits to his evil influences.

    I think Brenda Jefferson was simply recounting her experience which cannot be discounted.

  11. Paul N.~ I read your comment, “We also have to look at family curses and demonic strongholds apart from the sin nature.” I find this an interesting statement. Yes, we wrestle against our flesh, against the world,and against Satan. But, that does not excuse our actions. As for any ‘generational curse’, I found this…
    Question: “What does the Bible say about breaking generational curses?”

    Answer: The Bible mentions “generational curses” in several places (Exodus 20:5; 34:7; Numbers 14:18; Deuteronomy 5:9). It sounds unfair for God to punish children for the sins of their fathers. However, this is looking at it from an earthly perspective. God knows that the effects of sin are passed down from one generation to the next. When a father has a sinful lifestyle, his children are likely to have the same sinful lifestyle as well. That is why it is not unjust for God to punish sin to the third or fourth generation – because they are committing the same sins their ancestors did. But they are being punished for their own sins, not the sins of their ancestors. The Bible specifically tells us that God does not hold children accountable for the sins of their parents (Deuteronomy 24:16).

    There is a trend in the church today to try and blame every sin and problem on some sort of generational curse. This is not biblical. The cure for generational curses is salvation through Jesus Christ. When we become Christians, we are new creations (2 Corinthians 5:17). How can a child of God still be under God’s curse (Romans 8:1)? The cure, then, for a “generational curse” is faith in Christ and a life consecrated to Him (Romans 12:1-2).
    From http://www.gotquestions.org/generational-curses.html

    There is no escaping accountability, whether or not you grew up in a home void of the teachings of God’s word. Each of us are responsible for our own actions and will not be punished because of being raised by heathens, but because of the wickedness in the hearts of the unregenerate. Rejecting Christ is the reason the rebellious sinner is cast into hell; there he/she suffer the consequences of their sins and pay eternally.

  12. I point out the correlation of childhood molestation to homosexuality for the primary reason that gay activists adamantly insist that all gay people were “born that way.” They will not even entertain a discussion regarding the correlation between childhood molestation and homosexuality, which seems clear to me. Nearly every testimony I’ve seen and/or book I’ve read from a actively gay person or an ex-gay person includes molestation in their past. This cannot be overlooked.

    It is similar to the correlation between the absence of a father and involvement of young males in the criminal justice system. About 80% of the males in prison had absent or abusive fathers.

    Any problem or issue that is being addressed should be supported by facts and documentation. Otherwise, the person studying the issue is simply not making a serious effort to understand it with any depth or insight.

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